Christmas in Germany

Aside from the cheap airfares, another advantage of living in Europe is that you can get in your car in the morning and be in another country in the afternoon. Of course, being in relative proximity to Maria’s parents, Christmas in Germany was a given.

It took 10 hours to get there, driving through northern Italy, western Austria, and Bavaria in southern Germany, a relatively pain-free passage. Traffic going the other way was stopped dead, in some places, for 10km, without any apparent reason. Driving on European expressways is a pleasure, too, since, unlike the US, people know what lanes are for, and “the fast lane” has true meaning.

The two-week visit was tainted by Mr Young’s death within an hour of arriving, but in some ways it was the best place it could have happened, with loving and caring family and friends around to provide solace to Julius and Maria.

The Advent calendar is very big in Germany, and many towns – Forcheim near Maria’s parents being a great example – have larger-than-life calendars in the central plaza, accompanied by the ubiquitous Christkindlmarkt. Niklaus (Santa Claus) himself comes on December 6th, and the tree is decorated and gifts are exchanged on the 24th. We enjoyed venison and goose with Maria’s sister on the 24th, attended a (long and laborious) Christmas service at 10pm, and the next day stuffed ourselves again with duck at Maria’s parents.

New Year’s eve was spent with friends of Maria, culminating in fireworks all over the village at midnight. Fireworks are freely available to the public, and Germans spend some €60M on the stuff at New Year. Amazingly, there are very few incidents of injury. Imagine the same in the US – it would be pandemonium, if not life-threatening, providing ample reason enough to stay at home on New Year’s eve.

Aside from the obvious value time with family, we enjoyed good beer, schnapps, and food, with fish – carp (a local specialty), mackerel, and “waller” – on a few occasions providing welcome relief from the ever-present carnivorous diet. Also played some great tennis (for the first time in years) with some 40- and 50-something-year-olds. Strolls in the woods and exploring on bicycles with Julius were amazingly (in comparison with rural Italy) free of barking and attacking dogs – on one occasion as we approached a particularly large yet obedient and unexcited German shepherd, I said to Julius: “If we were in Italy, I’d turn around and flee.”

Julius didn’t want to leave, wanting to make sure that the candle on Mr Young’s grave was kept alight, and the fact that it would just “be easier” to stay in Germany. Maria’s parents were of the same opinion, and I heard from her mother about the folly of our Italian escapade on a few occasions.

Parting is always hard, and it was no easier on this occasion – I have this picture in my mind of Maria’s aging and frail parents standing tearfully and forlornly in their doorway as we drove away. The 1,057km drive took 11 hours coming back, with one long 25km stop-start stretch around Munich costing us the extra hour. Getting back to the house without Mr Young was, of course, wrenching, and it felt totally empty.

But being back in Italy helped also to highlight the stark differences between these two countries separated by a mountain range and a cultural chasm. Here are just a few:

• In Italy, strangers – men or women – greet you with kisses, while Germans stand their distance and extend only their hands.
• After clean streets for two weeks I’m now back to dodging excretory mines on the sidewalk.
• After the cold, grey, German weather, the sunny skies and blustery winds are welcome indeed, even if there’s no snow to please Julius.

Walking through the streets in Germany I was struck by how, well, Germanic everyone looks – square jaws, thin lips, deep-set eyes, strong bones. Duh? I guess somehow I don't subscribe to generalizations. In this sense, though, the Germans seem to conform to their caricature.

However, in another sense – efficiency, reliability – they did not, although I’m not sure if it was the Internet curse I brought with me that was the cause. The network of the only wireless hotspot I found was not working on the day I dedicated to catching up …